Are you in the middle of the Yucatan Jungle on a lawn chair, reading a book, drinking fresh pineapple juice, watching a Catapillar mine stone for your fence? 

Maybe.

Are you sunburnt?

No.

Maybe a little.

Okay my torso feels like I put Sriracha on it after giving it a good scrub.

But it doesn't hurt!

(He screamed as tears rolled down his face and he sobbed)

Okay maybe it does hurt a lil.

But I ain't here for telling.