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It Just Hit Me...

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516

The ecstasy?

No...Errrrrrm that was this morning.

The sad feeling of being childless and being semi-alone in a foreign country?

No...Not counting missing Jack in the Box Tacos all is pretty damn sassy down here...Never wanted kids really and I tend to stay decently occupied.

It's that in a few weeks, I'll be 52!

I NEVER thought I'd be this old, drinking Metamucil, modeling adult diapers for Japanese Businessmen online for Bitcoin, smelling like Ben Gay...Not to be confused with Gay Ben...Cus that's different.

Errrrrrrm his touch was gentle like the morning mist upon my brow, as I hiked in my Berkenstocks through the jungles of Yucatan.

And by hiking I mean, hiding from the sun at some Cantina, trying not to stare at busty waitressees and ordering Mojitos and whiskey shots.

Yeah so anyways, about an hour ago, I was walking my Old Dog and I was thinking how old she's gtting with her little gimpy walk and then I thought:

"I'm fucking 8 years from 60...I'm old like my dog!" and that hit me like that Speedball hit Chris Farley.

Okay maybe that was an exaggeration (AND NOT TRYING TO LOOK FOR COMPLIMENTS) But no hair, gray/silver scruff and a bunch of Crow's Feet or not, I think I maintained well for something half a century old, 5 decades, 4 bits or who watched Star Wars in the theaters in 1978...Or used to watch TV on a B/W with some weird tube that made a humming sound when it was heating up.

I remember 12 cent Snickers...Quarter cheeseburgers at McDonald's...I remember when Jack in the Box used to have a Jack in the Box...I also remember when women didn't have penises and testicles. 

Damn those were primitive days huh?

 

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