Why I Shave My Head
To infiltrate the the Blue Man Group? No.
Is it to pretend I have cancer and swindle people on some Fund Me Site? No.
Is it because that way I could wear all kinds of wigs easier, like black women do? No.
It's because I have a fear that one day, I would bump into Joe Biden and he would go straight to me, hold me tight in his mighty arms and try to sniff my hair like if I was a beautiful princess!
Not on my watch bucko!
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