To infiltrate the the Blue Man Group?  No.

Is it to pretend I have cancer and swindle people on some Fund Me Site?  No.

Is it because that way I could wear all kinds of wigs easier, like black women do?  No.

It's because I have a fear that one day, I would bump into Joe Biden and he would go straight to me, hold me tight in his mighty arms and try to sniff my hair like if I was a beautiful princess!

Not on my watch bucko!