I got bit by mosquitos everywhere till I got a bunch of anti-mosquito products...My back, my legs, my sweet ass, my shoulders etc.

"Noodles!  What about your penis???  It's so large it couldn't be missed!  I know this after peeking through your bathroom window as you showered!"- Brian Omen

Yes Omen...This is true but somehow my penis came out unscathed...My prayers and lit candle to Saint Johnson...Patron Saint of Penises worked!

I still remember the priest staring at me with angry eyes as I lit the candle after mass at my local cathedral.

 I probably looked exactly like the pic.

It was a magical time.