uoy willknot anticipate
the first 0 turn to 8
(distance between time and space)
secondtime
you realize
its not a 1time

3rdtime
will rewind and remind you
what have been forgot10

4th time
your eyes w8ll recognize
withput surprise
but you will yourself to hesitate

5th time you will
anticipate 0 turn to 8
and you will wonder ifits a mistaake

in 6th time
idont hesitate or anticipate
flying through 0
and becoming 8
lost and alone
looking back from everyone
pressurized delayed hope
crackles in my mind
and i open my eyes

With the UK on the verge of tearing itself apart, Gulls have become hench!

https://www.youtube.com/shorts/3vJ-166_zno?feature=share

dear journal
i put them in the back of my self driving karma
and the damn(e)dest thing
i dont know where it went
and havent seen them sense

I will not force myself to go to bed.

I'm at the verge of crying every day...Wednesdays and Thursdays are always the hardest work days for me currently. I practically have to drag myself to work everyday and it's hardest on these days.
Next Monday I have a 1:1 with my boss...I hope I can address the issues. Although I would prefer to talk to another person First to get their opinion before taking to my boss. I think that would be more strategic but I will not have a meeting with them until next Wednesday. And I don't think I can wait this long...the longer leave this unresolved the more anxiety I'm developing about this. It's such a dilemma: be strategic and tall to the righ person first, but deal with my fears and anxiety a week longer or just talk to my boss directly without having that other insight. I feel so burdened by it. And no one can really help me except those 2 supervisors. So I have to carry this until they have one for me.
I can barely focus on the little work I do have and that makes my anxiety even worse because I feel even more useless and like I'm not performing well that makes and my fears that they are planning to let me go even worse...

just talking by myself

i dont offer explanation and i dont ask for it

unless i need you to explain you to yourself

You ever think that the people you hang out with says a lot about oneself?