Middle age men complaining about women's low morals, my deeply disturbing fascination with silicone sex dolls and Minestrone soup in shoes:

Or men painting their toe nails the color of anal thermometers.

(Pauuuuuuuuse)

What???  Don't pretend you don't own one!

I give you a picture of my Prehistoric Premordial Dinosaur Looking Drake:

No not that one!

This one!  

Who just became a Papa this morning when his wifey had ducklings!

(Whispers softly in a deep, some say sexy Noodle voice)

If she divorces him he's FUCKED!

There's going to be like 8 of them!  

He'll have to fake his death to get out of that child support!

Unless he commits a tragic Murder-Suicide.

I'm just sayin'