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  • Summer is in full swing and that means insect swarms. I have nothing against our bug friends, I just don't like when they're all up in my face with the insect agenda!

    Summer is in full swing and that means insect swarms. I have nothing against our bug friends, I just don't like when they're all up in my face with the insect agenda!
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    3
    16 Commenti 0 condivisioni 223 Views
  • (not sure if anyone reads this, but I think I just need a platform to shout out... not suited for everyone I guess btw..)
    Living with Bipolar Disorder is just the worst... not sure if anyone else is dealing with this shit but the worst are those crashing episodes that you cannot foresee yourself.
    Especially those Episodes where you just running internally mentally wild and the only thing you feel is just that anyone just want to betray and hurt you... even your closest ones.
    In addition, when I'm in a breakdown, the ‘spectrum’ in me swings so hard that I literally become completely blind to communicative schemes and can no longer understand or interpret anything like indirect speech in any way (probably always the main reason why I try to withdraw from anyone).
    In these phases, indirect language is as incomprehensible to me as a foreign language that I can't understand in any way. Unfortunately, very few people understand this because they are used to other ways of communicating with me.
    I'm really not sure what triggered the current episode: the constant stress at work, the stress of being available for everyone and everything every second for the last few months, or my own realization and disappointment that I think I've made so many bad decisions in the past because of my good faith, which have destroyed paths I would have liked to take(career and study-wise).
    However, I currently hate myself more than usual; not only for what I haven't achieved at the moment, but especially for the way I behave towards others uncontrollably during this phase.
    I am unconsciously insulting and offending those who actually want the best for me.
    I hide and deny the real causes until it is too late... (I'm such a coward)
    I wish I would be fixable but I'm not I guess...

    The worst thing is probably this post-episode in which you realize that not only the world itself is the problem, but that your own grievance towards others is also the problem in this world.
    (No wonder why the S-rate is so high in this disorder circle, since most people can't find any other solution).

    Maybe I just want someone to tell me directly and unhinged that they actual love me for what I am and that what I'm trying to achieve is enough
    (not sure if anyone reads this, but I think I just need a platform to shout out... not suited for everyone I guess btw..) Living with Bipolar Disorder is just the worst... not sure if anyone else is dealing with this shit but the worst are those crashing episodes that you cannot foresee yourself. Especially those Episodes where you just running internally mentally wild and the only thing you feel is just that anyone just want to betray and hurt you... even your closest ones. In addition, when I'm in a breakdown, the ‘spectrum’ in me swings so hard that I literally become completely blind to communicative schemes and can no longer understand or interpret anything like indirect speech in any way (probably always the main reason why I try to withdraw from anyone). In these phases, indirect language is as incomprehensible to me as a foreign language that I can't understand in any way. Unfortunately, very few people understand this because they are used to other ways of communicating with me. I'm really not sure what triggered the current episode: the constant stress at work, the stress of being available for everyone and everything every second for the last few months, or my own realization and disappointment that I think I've made so many bad decisions in the past because of my good faith, which have destroyed paths I would have liked to take(career and study-wise). However, I currently hate myself more than usual; not only for what I haven't achieved at the moment, but especially for the way I behave towards others uncontrollably during this phase. I am unconsciously insulting and offending those who actually want the best for me. I hide and deny the real causes until it is too late... (I'm such a coward) I wish I would be fixable but I'm not I guess... The worst thing is probably this post-episode in which you realize that not only the world itself is the problem, but that your own grievance towards others is also the problem in this world. (No wonder why the S-rate is so high in this disorder circle, since most people can't find any other solution). Maybe I just want someone to tell me directly and unhinged that they actual love me for what I am and that what I'm trying to achieve is enough
    2 Commenti 0 condivisioni 469 Views
  • Hot and humid as fuck today. Meteorological summer is in full swing, although not as brutal like last year. Am I gonna kick out a playlist regardless? You bet your sweet bippy!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U7ofnHmxE-I
    Hot and humid as fuck today. Meteorological summer is in full swing, although not as brutal like last year. Am I gonna kick out a playlist regardless? You bet your sweet bippy! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U7ofnHmxE-I
    Like
    1
    4 Commenti 0 condivisioni 390 Views
  • #music #swing
    https://youtu.be/58SNFk75mfk
    #music #swing https://youtu.be/58SNFk75mfk
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    1
    0 Commenti 0 condivisioni 447 Views
  • #swing #electroswing #music
    https://youtu.be/0ZgjmE6xdaw?list=PL_1zTLVt7oqj5_uKtZLKRQVh6YYINA4IE
    #swing #electroswing #music https://youtu.be/0ZgjmE6xdaw?list=PL_1zTLVt7oqj5_uKtZLKRQVh6YYINA4IE
    0 Commenti 0 condivisioni 1K Views
  • I spent what felt like the whole day today in the park in my town, which also includes a small, partially abandoned cemetery.

    This place makes me thoughtful because of its structure: on one side, children play innocently on a playground, while young couples stroll nearby, their hands intertwined. Yet, just beyond them lies a retirement home, where the building gazes longingly at the cemetery—a silent reflection of mortality.

    In between, smaller, older, crumbling statues stand sentinel, guardians of forgotten stories, their weathered faces etched with the sorrows and joys of those who have come before. Complementing these fading relics, scaffolding is being erected for new architecture, a juxtaposition of the old and the new, of decay and renewal.

    As I walk through this park, a question quickly arises: what does it truly mean to live? We are born, we grow, we learn, we love, and inevitably, we pass away. But do we fade into nothingness, or do we leave a trace behind in our borrowed time? Perhaps a whisper lingers in the hearts of those we touch, a thread woven into the very fabric of the universe, connecting moments that seem so fleeting.

    Is it not a privilege to love and be loved, to create ripples in the fabric of time with our joy and our sorrow? In this park, where the clang of swing sets mingles with the soft rustle of leaves, I feel both connected and isolated—a thread in the grand tapestry of life and death, pulled taut yet ethereal.

    Beneath the laughter and love lies an unspoken truth: we are all temporary. Yet, is it not the beauty of our transience that makes moments so precious, illuminated against the backdrop of eternity? The whispers of those who have come before dance in the air, and I wonder, perhaps they are not so far removed; they linger with us in our laughter, our tears, and in the very act of living.

    I realize that while our bodies may return to dust, our spirits, woven into the lives and hearts of others, may transcend even death, echoing in the stories told under starlit nights and cradled within the whispers of time.
    I spent what felt like the whole day today in the park in my town, which also includes a small, partially abandoned cemetery. This place makes me thoughtful because of its structure: on one side, children play innocently on a playground, while young couples stroll nearby, their hands intertwined. Yet, just beyond them lies a retirement home, where the building gazes longingly at the cemetery—a silent reflection of mortality. In between, smaller, older, crumbling statues stand sentinel, guardians of forgotten stories, their weathered faces etched with the sorrows and joys of those who have come before. Complementing these fading relics, scaffolding is being erected for new architecture, a juxtaposition of the old and the new, of decay and renewal. As I walk through this park, a question quickly arises: what does it truly mean to live? We are born, we grow, we learn, we love, and inevitably, we pass away. But do we fade into nothingness, or do we leave a trace behind in our borrowed time? Perhaps a whisper lingers in the hearts of those we touch, a thread woven into the very fabric of the universe, connecting moments that seem so fleeting. Is it not a privilege to love and be loved, to create ripples in the fabric of time with our joy and our sorrow? In this park, where the clang of swing sets mingles with the soft rustle of leaves, I feel both connected and isolated—a thread in the grand tapestry of life and death, pulled taut yet ethereal. Beneath the laughter and love lies an unspoken truth: we are all temporary. Yet, is it not the beauty of our transience that makes moments so precious, illuminated against the backdrop of eternity? The whispers of those who have come before dance in the air, and I wonder, perhaps they are not so far removed; they linger with us in our laughter, our tears, and in the very act of living. I realize that while our bodies may return to dust, our spirits, woven into the lives and hearts of others, may transcend even death, echoing in the stories told under starlit nights and cradled within the whispers of time.
    Like
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    1 Commenti 0 condivisioni 4K Views
  • #Halloween #music #oldies #vintage #jazz #swing
    I don't care if it is still August...
    https://youtu.be/ue3W7_9MM1E
    #Halloween #music #oldies #vintage #jazz #swing I don't care if it is still August... https://youtu.be/ue3W7_9MM1E
    Like
    1
    0 Commenti 0 condivisioni 1K Views
  • Summertime in full swing. Let's do it!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gF9oHYPsNiI
    Summertime in full swing. Let's do it! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gF9oHYPsNiI
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    1
    0 Commenti 0 condivisioni 586 Views
  • The calendar says May but the weather says summer is in full swing. 135 AM and one hell of a thunderstorm is raging outside. Noisy fucker to boot.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ivdBhNRVGwU

    The calendar says May but the weather says summer is in full swing. 135 AM and one hell of a thunderstorm is raging outside. Noisy fucker to boot. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ivdBhNRVGwU
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    2
    0 Commenti 0 condivisioni 920 Views
  • SO YOU BITCHES think you're tough because you jumped me? Waited for me to be alone..... on my dang porch???? I still handled all of you, left 5 of you on the ground laid out!! You're lucky I don't have any marks on my face. I have some on my arms and neck, so what!!!! I bet you didn't expect me to swing back since it was six against one. I might be old but I'm not too old for this!!! Yeah, I'm not gonna lie, I was getting tired of fighting and just wanted to go back in the house but I kept on swinging and made sure you got yours.. PUNKS!!!!! All I have to say is, you started this and I finished it..... I hate bullies!! Mosquitos are not my friends!!!
    SO YOU BITCHES think you're tough because you jumped me? Waited for me to be alone..... on my dang porch???? ๐Ÿ˜ก I still handled all of you, left 5 of you on the ground laid out!! You're lucky I don't have any marks on my face. I have some on my arms and neck, so what!!!! I bet you didn't expect me to swing back since it was six against one. I might be old but I'm not too old for this!!! Yeah, I'm not gonna lie, I was getting tired of fighting and just wanted to go back in the house but I kept on swinging and made sure you got yours.. PUNKS!!!!! All I have to say is, you started this and I finished it..... I hate bullies!! Mosquitos are not my friends!!! ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ’ช๐Ÿ’ช๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ’€๐ŸฆŸ
    Haha
    Like
    Yay
    Wow
    17
    3 Commenti 0 condivisioni 677 Views
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