Embrace the Storm
I wrote a poem, which will become a future song, about my 15year partner PJ

Embrace the Storm
by XZanthia
He doesn’t flinch when the lightning hits.
He never asked me to dim.
He just stood still
while the sky cracked open
and smiled
like it was beautiful.
He saw the fire in my chest
and didn’t reach for water.
He knew
I wasn’t dangerous
I was divine.
He don’t compete, he completes
He don’t crumble when the current heats
While boys bail out, he’s building rafts
While others fear, he laughs at collapse
I shook the room, he didn’t blink
I roared in rage, he made me think
He knows how to hold
without holding me back
and that’s how you carry
a queen’s heart intact
To walk beside a powerful woman
you don’t need chains
you need courage
Not armor, but honor
Not silence,
but space
He never caged the lioness
He never named me “too much”
He simply looked
and let me be
until I let him
see everything
Powerful presence, patient, precise
Protecting peace without a price
Fire-fed, focused, feeling full
He’s not afraid, I’m never dull
He’s got thunder in his spine
Steel in his silence
Grace in his gaze
and no trace of violence
HE NEVER RAN FROM MY RAGE!
HE NEVER NEEDED ME SMALL!
HE HELD MY CHAOS IN HIS HANDS
AND NEVER DROPPED ME
AT ALL!
Other men feared me
He faced me
Other men chased me
He stayed
When I shattered, he sharpened me
When I wept, he witnessed me
He didn’t want to fix the fire
He wanted to feel it with me
And maybe you think
this song’s about you…
Maybe you wish it could be
But only a rare one
gets written into fire like this.
Real ones rise when her voice shakes the walls
Real ones don’t shrink when the goddess calls
If she’s the storm, he’s the ground beneath
Still. Sure. Strong in belief.
This ain’t fiction, it’s a fact
You want a queen? Learn how to act
Not to conquer, not to own
But to honor her
like a throne
HE NEVER ASKED ME TO SHUT UP!
NEVER ASKED ME TO SHRINK!
HE TOOK MY FIRE
AND FED IT!!
I am the flame
And he holds me
I am the howl
And he hears me
I am the storm
But he never tried to stop the rain
He just stood
With open hands
And loves me
without fear.

Word is the average Gen Z person has the same level of anxiety and neurotic behavior of an institutionalized mental health patient in the 1950s. Instead of using this dysfunctional energy for creativity, they'd rather cry and complain about it. Therein lies the difference.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YwWVE84OEIA

#nurse #death #deathbed #afterlife #wish #health

https://www.ladbible.com/news/health/nurse-julie-mcfadden-dying-patient-say-same-thing-651737-20240718

Clinton, Biden and Obama are running a fundraiser for Biden's campaign, 2 Alzheimer patients and the puppeteer!

#neuralink #patient #videogames #videogaming #brain

https://www.ign.com/articles/first-human-patient-to-receive-a-neuralink-brain-implant-used-it-to-stay-up-all-night-playing-civilization-6

So apparentaly some 68 y/o lady with a weapon decided to f up the hospital around the corner and now there is a large scale police operation on my block...Blue party light been going on for hours. Never seen so many ambulances at one spot. I hope they only transport the patients to another Hospital... Hope there are no new injurys.

Well there is only one thing left to do when society falls around you.
Lock your self in your bubble like the true introvert you are...Time to bedazzle my cosplay I guess. Happy places and sparkles...

Waiting impatiently

True story:

Thirteen years ago, around Halloween, my mother passed away.
Almost a year to the day, my grandmother followed suit.

That following year, 2010, was pockmarked with tragedies. Lost my car in a wreck (one of several). Lost the place I was living in to a fire. Lost my wife in a divorce. The year 2010 just wasn't kind to me, and I desperately needed some kind of mental relief.

One night at the end of Summer, I had a dream. I was a child again, and I was at my mother's house. My mother sat in an old recliner, held me, and sang just like she used to. She comforted me and told me that everything would be alright. The feeling of peace and tranquility was palpable.

Then she looked down at me with a malicious grin that radiated evil and said, "You know I'm not really your mother, right?"

BAM! Instantly awake. Feeling of tranquility: completely fucking gone.

I've had similar dreams off and on since 2010. I no longer believe they're just dreams anymore.

Last night, I dreamed of my grandmother. Similar situation: relatively peaceful dream. (Grandmother's house was always peaceful. Even guests and friends always said they felt like napping as soon as they got there, like their cares and worries melted away as soon as they entered the living room.) Grandmother was there, her typically patient, quiet, matronly self, radiating that quiet strength we all knew so well. In the dream, I was still living with my grandmother, and everything was fine. The peace in the house was almost suffocating.

Yeah, I knew this trap by now, and I wasn't falling in.

I went up and hugged her, then said, "I miss you." (Who says that to someone they live with and see on a regular basis?)

"Yeah, I miss her, too," said the thing pretending to be my grandmother, a trace of smug satisfaction in its voice, all peace and tranquility replaced with an aura of malevolence and mischief. "I've enjoyed pretending to be her, bringing you comfort. She was one of a kind. So was your mother."

If words could only describe how hideous the thing became when I called it the demon I knew it to be.

Then I finally woke up.

I'm really sick of these damn "nightmares".