Another day wasted by sleeping too long and then forcing myself to do chores like groceries...
I sat down to look at job offerings to at least do something useful instead of staring at my phone. Just to find that the only job offer that I had my hopes on is expired. They probably filled the position and didn't even read my application anymore. All other things I find are not in my expertise and also not in my local vicinity....
This disappointment was the last thing I needed right now. I was already in the ditch feeling burned out, abandoned and left alone with my problems. People are just too busy to care. Now I can put hopelessness right next to it on my depression Bingo card...
What an awesome start this year. And with the current political situation it will only get worse. Shit time to be alive our future is as rosy as a dumpster. I'm loosing any desire to see it.

This is rich. They hinting that women (especially married) , blacks and rural America don’t know how to get an ID…..
https://x.com/yesnicksearcy/status/2021818026107064587

The culture war is this country is beyond comical. The internet has given every neurotic blowhard a platform to feign outrage and it's not healthy. Life is short and hopefully many people will find wasting time on things with no real importance other than to divide and control us isn't worth the effort.

And one for VD. I may not be here tomorrow. Got a hot date with a hooker. Gonna run me about 300 bucks, but that's still cheaper than wining and dining my ex-wife was.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k6Rl8TpGIP4

Another day left abandoned in the ditch of depression and burnout. Let's see how long I will be burning myself out today.
At least I can I turn to music for consolation without being let down.


There is one phrase that almost everyone close to you will say but never actually mean it. People who stay true to it are exceptionally rare and never get that back from others.

I needed three rare figures from ebay, lucky star to complete my collection. I sent a message can I just have 3 in red. They made a new listing, the three I needed instead of the the onesI already owned, So I bought them. They just arrived, maybe there was some confusion because seller has sent the 3 I wanted and the the girls as well. Now I have two sets of lucky star figures, popped em on my monitor. I had to get them out of their body bags just not right!

You cannot understand the Deep State targeting of President Trump without understanding the Deep State targeting of President Nixon.
Side note(added 2-13)

Exactly the same, except different times.

I believe POTUS Nixon would do the same as POTUS Trump if he were president now, knowing all that's transpired in the last 20 years.

President Nixon would have fought until the end and never resigned.

I just had a meltdown in the lab...because I'm burned and spent by this shit. This company has burned me completely and I'm just a walking pile of ash. Every passing day I wish more and more that I was one of the people that were layed off or that I would have an accident break and ankle or so and get a sick leave for a few weeks. Just to catch a breath and be an unexpected gap on the personal.
It's not the stress that's getting me I actually don't think the workload is overwhelming at the moment it's average and manageable. It's the lack of pay and appreciation that bothers me. I came on Saturdays I came on Sundays gave 110% to make them see that I am worth getting the same pay as the others and instead I get a warm sweaty handshake and a chocolate I can't even eat.
And I'm still trying to give a 110 percent that I don't even have in me anymore why because of revenge because I want it to hurt heavily when I leave and I want to see them in false security about my loyalty. But I'm not even sure that's worth it...
At this point I just wish for a new job opportunity and hope the company goes bankrupt so that I can get social support. I wouldn't get that for a few months if I resigned without a new job.

I'm so tired of all I don't even know how I still manage to get myself out if bed everyday. In the past few weeks I caught myself wishing I would catch a nasty cold or even fall off the bike and break something so I can catch a break...
How Terrible is that.

I'm having an extremely shitty day. days of work for the bin because the detection failed. This project is being such a bitch. Great.. running on overtime again and for what it's not even giving me good results. I am so pissed by this. I can forget about my Hobbies and sports again. I'll just go to bed what's the point of having a life anyway. I just hate that this stupid company has such a major impact on my private life. More and more I envy the people who were laid off. Because they don't have to carry the burden of our leadership's incompetence anymore.