i hate days like this where i cant think straight unless im posting str8 bullshit!!

Just done a modern conversion. The struggle is real, bought a clock movement with chime, as this clock has been gutted for parts and baught small hands as the hands were too big; Chinese or seller cannot do metric or imperial it would seem. The hands didn't fit the shaft nor were they the right length I had to cut the hands down to size. Anyway, clock may a have a modern movement but she looks good in the corner of my home office. I hate fine woodwork, brass and enamel work go to waste but with the crack in her woodwood she's not as good as the other case. Since this is a present for my mum I want it look good and work like clockwork, pun intended.

https://www.youtube.com/shorts/DP_mvm0iwV8

if i were jebus id hate creed so much

I hate too do this to a beautiful time piece but needs must as the devil wants. In order to fix one clock, I need spair parts, even for someone with alot of time of their hands I do not have the skills to make parts from scratch and even the clocksmith told me if they were to make them from scratch it would cost up to $1000 to fix a clock I bough for $75. So the only other option is buy another broken down clock for its works and salvage the working parts. Whats left I'll keep aside and restore it when a clock works goes on sale on ebay which is rare these days. For the time being and in order for this pretty case not to go to waste I'll convert it with a modern Quartz movement and restore its mechanical works when I can get the parts to restore it; its also missing a pendulum which is also problem as mantle clock works are rearer than wall clock works and pendulums are matched to the works.

Wow I am amazed the UK Poilice solved a crime in the last 15 years that wasn't hate speech on twitter or facebook. Colour me impressed. That said it still took em 50 years to catch em but a win is a win.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UyxVsPWggzE

(not sure if anyone reads this, but I think I just need a platform to shout out... not suited for everyone I guess btw..)
Living with Bipolar Disorder is just the worst... not sure if anyone else is dealing with this shit but the worst are those crashing episodes that you cannot foresee yourself.
Especially those Episodes where you just running internally mentally wild and the only thing you feel is just that anyone just want to betray and hurt you... even your closest ones.
In addition, when I'm in a breakdown, the ‘spectrum’ in me swings so hard that I literally become completely blind to communicative schemes and can no longer understand or interpret anything like indirect speech in any way (probably always the main reason why I try to withdraw from anyone).
In these phases, indirect language is as incomprehensible to me as a foreign language that I can't understand in any way. Unfortunately, very few people understand this because they are used to other ways of communicating with me.
I'm really not sure what triggered the current episode: the constant stress at work, the stress of being available for everyone and everything every second for the last few months, or my own realization and disappointment that I think I've made so many bad decisions in the past because of my good faith, which have destroyed paths I would have liked to take(career and study-wise).
However, I currently hate myself more than usual; not only for what I haven't achieved at the moment, but especially for the way I behave towards others uncontrollably during this phase.
I am unconsciously insulting and offending those who actually want the best for me.
I hide and deny the real causes until it is too late... (I'm such a coward)
I wish I would be fixable but I'm not I guess...

The worst thing is probably this post-episode in which you realize that not only the world itself is the problem, but that your own grievance towards others is also the problem in this world.
(No wonder why the S-rate is so high in this disorder circle, since most people can't find any other solution).

Maybe I just want someone to tell me directly and unhinged that they actual love me for what I am and that what I'm trying to achieve is enough

Emotional dysregulation sucks... I was actually in quite a good mood today Until one little thing pushed the wrong button in me earlier and now I'm still brooding over it. At least my Harp took the anger out of it. That means the explosiveness is gone and i am more rational and calm. But I think I have been reacting too harshly earlier and now anxiety has replaced anger.
This just Sucks...
I hate that my emotions are right under my skin...