BR1AN_OM3N You are worrisome, big sexy! Haven't posted a selfie showcasing your tireless devotion to weight training in a week or two. I care about your needs!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TULQB8esDro

Looong post...(Sorry I just need to dump this emotion somewhere. I don't have any friends left to dump it on...)

I think I don't enjoy spending time with my friend anymore. And this scaes me because I recently lost another good freind due to growing apart. And I don't want to lose this one too... I miss being careless just doing fun things forgetting the wories of the world for a while.

Today was not fun at all. Nothing at all like I imagined or how we planned the day: Just 2 gilfriends doing mundane girl things like shopping going for drinks and having a good time. That was the plan.

No, instead I spend the entire day people pleasing and enduring socializing with one of her old university friends we met, because she seemed to have a good time and I really wanted her to have a good time & fully enjoy this weekend as she has a lot of other troubles at home & I want to be her safe space/happy place.
I tolerated not doing any of the things we had planned, just to end the day with her emotion dumping on me how shitty and disappointing the reunion with her uni freind was and how no one wants to be friends with her if they don't benefit from her in one way or another...So I was the emotional Dumpster...

I am not meaning to blame her but she is doing the same thing to me: I am always her emotional dumpster who listends and gives advice. So she benefits from me. And all the things I want to do, the plans we made before are overthrown. By some kind of drama every time.
Last time we saw each other was the same: It was completely ruined, all plans were overthrown because of her bf making drama and me having to be the should to cry on and fix her up for most of the day. I am sick of spending "quality time" like this. I am always the one who's getting the short end and the disappointment.

And now I'm sitting here crying in frustration and disappointment beacue I really miss having my friend around and I want the carefree time back when we did the things we planned and had a good time: Go shopping and try on silly things for fun, go hiking and fool around in the autumn leaves, forget all troubles, laugh and just enjoy the simplest things in company of our comfort person.
All I want is to have something like this again:

#Xmas #Christmas
Christmas Carol

Had a very busy past few days,so much going on. Finally day off went to see Heretic with my best friend ,interesting film overall but not really my style of horror. hit up a few stores at the mall before the movie (giant mall with the theatre attached),worked on some new music and wrote riffs tonight that i need to edit but overall the results will be worth it. and had the WEIRDIST encounter with my crazy neighbor, few weeks ago he slammed his door so loud it shook my unit when i was just sitting outside on my porch drinking water and reading (guess he hates readers ??),had to write him a letter that i wasnt going to possess his dog or hurt him in anyway (cuz I'm so scary..i guess ??),after coming back from my walk tonight ran into him again, I always have my headphones in usually (was listening to Behexen) and he just PULLS his dog in as i walk by, the dog whimpers in FEAR of me because i'm just an awful person (yes this is actually what he thinks) we also communicate by slamming doors extremely violently i really can't wait until he leaves, or gets kicked out, it will never stop with him.

Too big to rig bitches. Trumps in. So Bono needs to drive his car off a cliff. Half of Hollywood needs to leave america. Kamala needs to truly work at McDonald's. Libs need to meltdown and the view needs to get cancelled. Also of course America needs to do a 180. Stay classy usa

Wow seeing that clip of cardi b at the Kamala rally panicking because she couldn't read the teleprompter and fumbling hard till someone ran up a cell phone for her to read off of just shows how paid these celebs are to support Kamala. They have no reason to support her and they don't even know why they are.

#videogames #videogame #videogaming
https://www.xda-developers.com/brilliant-games-without-graphics-card/