I am so drained by all of this...I feel like I'm the glue holding this situation together. I kept suprisingly calm when others couldn't and had my anxiety under control, sacrificed my comfort zone for others and swallowed my dicsontent and annoyedness for the sake of peace in this severe situation bc in this situation a familly fight would be the worst and I am also very harmony desireing & driven. I only have the strenght to do this because I care about my family so much.

But now things are kinda decided over my head, and I will only get my space back for a mere few days before I'm indruded upon again. I would not say no but at least, it would be nice and considerate to include me into the decision over my own space and listen to my opinion on what would be the best and most helpful in this situation.

I just wanna hit pause and have a bit of a breather... I am so overwhlemed by the general situation And can't do most of the things that are emotional ventiles for me, because of permantely having to function. I even got sick myself and still functioned for others. I am the one who doesn't have the luxury of getting to be overwhelmed right now...I have to function permanently until I go to bed at night becaue I am the tape that holds things right now.

#bed #videogames #sheets #invaders

Hello.

Visiting my dad and his girlfriend. I'd usually feel disturbed hearing the words "dad" and "girlfriend" together, but she's definitely helped him improve his life, so she's good by me. Before this, I hadn't seen him in 5 years (besides a short visit we had in October of 2024.)

Other than that, here's a picture of Jonesie.

I hope when you go to bed tonight that every moment of doubt someone made you feel goes away. I hope every moment you felt small disappears and I hope you remember you are fucking priceless and no one can take that from you unless you let them.

HEYYY JETZTE GEHTS ABB. WIR SCHIEBEN SIE ALLE AB https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jgJ0PbEDzao

Urgh I already had a shit day before the day even started and now the day proceeds to be shitty after I finally made ot out of bed.
Not at all how I imagied the first day of my vacation...

noiiiiiiiiiiiiiceeeeeeeee!! it's bed time!

42 fucking minutes until shift ends.
Managed to have a somewhat productive day, halfway through with my Oracle Database Administration course and serviced all the sales people with laptop issues.

Pffff. Can't wait to land motionless on my bed when I finish work.