Nothing is worse for a highly intelligent and gifted person to be under-challenged and underwhelmed....

Today, I came home from work crying because I realised how underchallenged and boring my work currently is. My expertise is currently not being used because customer projects come in slow and don't get to the downstream processing/purification part (I'm a specialist for protein pruification). I don't get many other opportunities to show my skills and knowledge and only do some minor backup tasks like writing working instructions...Nothing about my work currenly feels rewaring and chellengeing. I am a scientist, I love the try and error and the challenge! I thrive in that. I literally work best with stress and being overloaded with work than with being underwhelmed...
On top of it I'm gettin really bad imposter syndrome because of not being able to show my expertise while my colleagues currenlty thrive and get ever opportunity to show their knowledge and expert fields. We got a new teamlead in march and so far I feel like I could not show off/prove my skille and knowledge to him while the others could. I feel like I'm standing in the shadows sometimes even being actively pushed back into them. Like a tool put in a shelf not neede for now collecting dust.
It's incredibly frustrating and deressing for me because I am a scientist by heart I love my profession...

Now my overthinking brain gets even to the point where I'm asking myself if they are boring me out on purpose, so I leave the company on my own accord and they don't have to fire me, because they can't without a reason....
I'm more and more thinking of actually looking for a different posititon... Maybe I'll apply for a pHD after all...

I'm thinking about writing a screenplay with a Latina chick who works at McDonalds during the day and dances as a stripper at night to pay for her college tuition. I'm calling it the Spicy McMuffin...Trump on Patrol.

45 years ago, one of my favorite comedies was released. Star-studded cast, great writing, and I'm sure was the inspiration for Happy Gilmore...another great flick on it's own.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=phagxOal7_A

hehe writing the neshty on tumblr

#girlboss #manicpixie

I nailed the interview and told them I don't see a reason why not to hire me. I am sure my skills blew them away as I've seen them writing down everthing I said... Let's see...

Just got this (finally) yesterday new Cradle Of Filth limited wooden Boxset,haven't had a chance to listen to the new album but soon enough. Much worth the wait,glad to have a new storage box and more writing and creating materials !

I find myself in music, not in mirrors. We are characters in the stories of our minds rewriting the dialogues our souls scream into the universe. We are the heroes and the villians, the damsels in distress and the ones looking to be saved or save others. We are the ones who find warmth in the shadows and longing in the dark seeking comfort in the moments that confound us and swoop us up. We bear scars seen and unseen on our bodies or within our souls and hearts. We at the end of the day though despite the darkness in which we prefer our comfort are survivors. In that I am very proud of EACH of you.