1.  If it's any semi attractive female talking to you who isn't cross eyed, balding or needs a quick shave.

2.  If it's flirty or tells you how attractive you are when we all know the reality. "You're telling me you got that Greek god body without exercising and eating microwave food?  Amazing!"

3.  If it's interested in whatever bullshit you do..."You dabble in  Magic the Gathering?  You must get laid so much!!!"-It would say

4.  If the pic is of an attractive female with no visible penis bulge... Because as Brian Omen told me in strict confidence.  "If I can't see it, it doesn't count, especially in the dark."

5.  If it asks you if you know John Conner and if you do, can you tell "her" where he's at.