oh... weekend at last!
There's nothing better than sitting on your 'balcony' (more like an escape staircase) with a hot cup of tea in your hand and enjoying the cold late fall air.
And today I'm lucky that the party mile where I live is suspiciously quiet at the moment.

After such an exhausting week, it just feels soooo good

For a few months now, I’ve been trying to go to the gym three times a week, if possible, even though I often have to find the motivation, especially after work. :D

Little by little, I’m starting to see progress in my body, especially when I look in the mirror in the morning and notice my improving natural posture and skin.

It’s an extreme contrast to look back at my past when I was constantly (and at times, very) overweight since childhood.

I spent what felt like the whole day today in the park in my town, which also includes a small, partially abandoned cemetery.

This place makes me thoughtful because of its structure: on one side, children play innocently on a playground, while young couples stroll nearby, their hands intertwined. Yet, just beyond them lies a retirement home, where the building gazes longingly at the cemetery—a silent reflection of mortality.

In between, smaller, older, crumbling statues stand sentinel, guardians of forgotten stories, their weathered faces etched with the sorrows and joys of those who have come before. Complementing these fading relics, scaffolding is being erected for new architecture, a juxtaposition of the old and the new, of decay and renewal.

As I walk through this park, a question quickly arises: what does it truly mean to live? We are born, we grow, we learn, we love, and inevitably, we pass away. But do we fade into nothingness, or do we leave a trace behind in our borrowed time? Perhaps a whisper lingers in the hearts of those we touch, a thread woven into the very fabric of the universe, connecting moments that seem so fleeting.

Is it not a privilege to love and be loved, to create ripples in the fabric of time with our joy and our sorrow? In this park, where the clang of swing sets mingles with the soft rustle of leaves, I feel both connected and isolated—a thread in the grand tapestry of life and death, pulled taut yet ethereal.

Beneath the laughter and love lies an unspoken truth: we are all temporary. Yet, is it not the beauty of our transience that makes moments so precious, illuminated against the backdrop of eternity? The whispers of those who have come before dance in the air, and I wonder, perhaps they are not so far removed; they linger with us in our laughter, our tears, and in the very act of living.

I realize that while our bodies may return to dust, our spirits, woven into the lives and hearts of others, may transcend even death, echoing in the stories told under starlit nights and cradled within the whispers of time.

After a few days, I've found the leisure to switch on my PC again and not linger on the sofa/bed right after work (all day)
Even though I don't really feel like spending my time on the computer at the moment...

It's a strange contrast to when I used to enjoy spending most of my free time on the PC.
I don't know if it's because I'm getting older and my interests are fundamentally changing, or simply because I'm completely oversaturated with computers due to my work as an IT specialist ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I find all these gambling advertisements on this site really confusing.
Most of them have strings of numbers in their banners or URLs and my weird brain is always trying to work out what each string of numbers stands for.
For example: what the hell is meant by 789???
"When creating the site, I just wanted to use the top row of my number block on the keyboard"? :D :D :D

https://youtu.be/xlBikPOehEg?si=bt1Gafw9VdJk6z9d

Once again I find myself alone, I feel there is no other way
Can it be I’ve got a heart of stone? I feel my life is written like a play
Help me say it loud, The visions in my mind won’t let me down
Help me get my cure, There’s something else, I cannot be for sure

Talk to me, come on - I feel your hate so clear, I feel it all around
Talk to me, come on - I never thought I’d fear my own desires near

I don’t wanna stare into thе darkness or settle for thе give and take
Can it be we have another problem? I feel like everything is a mistake
Help me say it loud, The visions in my mind won’t let me down
Help me get my cure, There’s something else, I cannot be for sure

Talk to me, come on - I feel your hate so clear, I feel it all around
Talk to me, come on - I never thought I’d fear my own desires near
Talk to me, come on - oh I cannot let you go, my black heart tells me so
Talk to me, come on - oh I don’t want to be vain, a life without your name

Just talk to me, just talk to me
Talk to me, talk to me, just talk to me

haha, that moment when you're talking to your parents about the festivals planned for the upcoming year and your dad suddenly insists on going to one of the festivals now because Anne Clark is performing there :D

So I'm finally "awake" again after visiting the M'era Luna and the long train journey home yesterday.
M'era Luna was just great this year!
The last time was years ago and this year was my first time ever camping at a festival.

I was so lucky with my tent group which was organised by my sister; everyone fitted together perfectly and camping with them was so nice and felt really safe and comfortable.
This also helped a lot when I got a severe migraine one day and was overwelmed, which was absolutely no problem with the group and I was able to create a safe space for myself despite the unfamiliar terrain.

As a festival, I find M'era really interesting compared to other festivals I know. In fact, I find it really "difficult" to compare it to another festival, as it is somehow its own concept.
For example, I found that at this festival the focus was less on the music and more on the scene itself due to the mass of side programmes such as workshops or the medieval market which was right in front of the entrance to the festival site.

I'm already really looking forward to next year's festival!