https://youtu.be/DZOC1QXTQLk?si=M4OUE8ZZkd3tSPkX
This is one of my many many favorite funny songs/videos.

Looong post...(Sorry I just need to dump this emotion somewhere. I don't have any friends left to dump it on...)

I think I don't enjoy spending time with my friend anymore. And this scaes me because I recently lost another good freind due to growing apart. And I don't want to lose this one too... I miss being careless just doing fun things forgetting the wories of the world for a while.

Today was not fun at all. Nothing at all like I imagined or how we planned the day: Just 2 gilfriends doing mundane girl things like shopping going for drinks and having a good time. That was the plan.

No, instead I spend the entire day people pleasing and enduring socializing with one of her old university friends we met, because she seemed to have a good time and I really wanted her to have a good time & fully enjoy this weekend as she has a lot of other troubles at home & I want to be her safe space/happy place.
I tolerated not doing any of the things we had planned, just to end the day with her emotion dumping on me how shitty and disappointing the reunion with her uni freind was and how no one wants to be friends with her if they don't benefit from her in one way or another...So I was the emotional Dumpster...

I am not meaning to blame her but she is doing the same thing to me: I am always her emotional dumpster who listends and gives advice. So she benefits from me. And all the things I want to do, the plans we made before are overthrown. By some kind of drama every time.
Last time we saw each other was the same: It was completely ruined, all plans were overthrown because of her bf making drama and me having to be the should to cry on and fix her up for most of the day. I am sick of spending "quality time" like this. I am always the one who's getting the short end and the disappointment.

And now I'm sitting here crying in frustration and disappointment beacue I really miss having my friend around and I want the carefree time back when we did the things we planned and had a good time: Go shopping and try on silly things for fun, go hiking and fool around in the autumn leaves, forget all troubles, laugh and just enjoy the simplest things in company of our comfort person.
All I want is to have something like this again:

Today is one of them days where I have Zero Motivation to work but 100% Motivation to pursue my hobbies. Unfortunately i gotta earn money to spend in the materials first... i can’t wait to get home and do fun stuff.

Now that Trump will be back at the wheel, it's time to get back to good old fashioned family values, the likes you would find in a 1950's or early 60's sitcom. With JD Vance as his wingman and his Catholic goon squad legislating morality in the Supreme Court, it shouldn't take long to abolish all debauchery, sin, drugs, and just fun of any kind.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TonTGAfn2zI

My soul really needed this long weekend for myself...
I was mentally burning out in the shadow of a high functioning facade for 2 months. I needed a break from life and from functioning perfectly. A small vacation without any obligations or an agenda. Just me alone and my art. And the luxury to decide on on a whim, what I feel like doing. No places to be at certain times, no schedule, no peole to meet... Just time passing by at my own pace....
I know its odd, but spending time alone is actually the most relaxing for me. Going on vacations/traveling is just stressing me out.

Went to a pumpkin patch today, Did the corn maze and the prize was four peices of candy but I still had a lot of fun
Ft: Cute lil bees on the flowers at the sunflower field

Word is the average Gen Z person has the same level of anxiety and neurotic behavior of an institutionalized mental health patient in the 1950s. Instead of using this dysfunctional energy for creativity, they'd rather cry and complain about it. Therein lies the difference.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YwWVE84OEIA

forever n ever isnt That FUN!!!

I have some creepy customer who keeps on inviting me to "hang out" at his place because he has parties at his house ,iv'e told him multipole times no and i'm waiting for him to stop asking its super awkward because he hasn't asked any of my other co-workers and ONLY invites me. its funny too because he makes all these signs and stuff for the parties,like saying there will be a fire outside,but its like 89 degress out so its just going to make everything hotter outside ??? ok ? yeah weird...