https://youtu.be/ZENSefFLbFE?si=4-e8XdlnKTJ_1BW5
XZanthia massage

Actually, I should be happy about the day off today (regional holiday), but you know when half the day ends in a task paralysis due to the sudden break in the routine and you just can't leave the bed not matter what?

Yet, this task paralysis probably has other causes and I am once again denying all the warning signals that are trying to tell me that there is less wick left in my inner candle than I want to admit.
Maybe it's just a great deal of self-doubt that's building up in me and is driven by the fact that I no longer “able” (or have the ambition) to do things that I have planned and am looking forward to. The task paralysis is of course more than counterproductive at a time like this and is more like a vicious circle.

Perhaps the residual warmth I feel inside me is the remaining embers of a flame that is currently dying out

Since I have no real friends anymore who care about my mental well being and cheer me up, I'll spent the rest of the day with my 2 most loyal friends Meghan and Isolde that never fail to bring joy and harmony back to my life. 🪉