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  • It's still the 'Kennedy Center' for me

    No way am I calling it 'The Trump and Kennedy Center'!

    God bless President John F. Kennedy!!

    It's actually pretty mind boggling why Trump would disrespect President Kennedy like that despite Kennedy basically having an 'America First' Policy and battled the same Deep State that Trump is currently facing.

    Unless, it's simply because he was a 'Democrat'? .-.
    It's still the 'Kennedy Center' for me🍷🌹 No way am I calling it 'The Trump and Kennedy Center'! God bless President John F. Kennedy!! 🌹 It's actually pretty mind boggling why Trump would disrespect President Kennedy like that despite Kennedy basically having an 'America First' Policy and battled the same Deep State that Trump is currently facing. Unless, it's simply because he was a 'Democrat'? .-.
    On Fire
    1
    2 التعليقات 0 المشاركات 394 مشاهدة
  • Of Dostoyevsky’s four major novels, Demons is perhaps the least well known — though seems most pertinent to our strange times. A dark social and political satire, psychological drama and vast human tragedy, it’s pretty astonishing. A different translation utilizing a different “take” on the title, Devils.
    Of Dostoyevsky’s four major novels, Demons is perhaps the least well known — though seems most pertinent to our strange times. A dark social and political satire, psychological drama and vast human tragedy, it’s pretty astonishing. A different translation utilizing a different “take” on the title, Devils.
    0 التعليقات 0 المشاركات 642 مشاهدة
  • YouTube.com/XZanthiaMUSIC This is music that refuses to sit still.
    It isn’t here to soothe you or fade into the background—
    it exists to keep you alert, slightly off-balance,
    never certain what’s about to unfold next.

    Every moment is a corner you haven’t turned yet.
    Just when you think you understand it,
    it shifts, lunges, softens, surprises.
    It’s an acquired taste, absolutely—
    not something inherited, familiar, or politely nostalgic.
    This is not comfort food. This is appetite disruption.

    I want the sound to confuse you, to intrigue you,
    to make you uneasy in a way that keeps pulling you closer.
    To catch you enjoying tension,
    finding pleasure in resistance,
    realizing that discomfort can feel intimate
    when it refuses to let go.

    You may not always know what you’re hearing,
    but you’ll never be bored—
    because at any moment it’s ready to leap out,
    wrap around you,
    and pull you into that strange place
    where struggle feels like an embrace.



    Project 19.5 is an ethereal, esoteric music project that began in 1998, long before genres like “witch house,” “dark ambient,” or “experimental pop” had names attached to them. What started as intimate sonic experimentation grew over decades into a body of work shaped by collaborations with multiple producers across different eras, each phase capturing a different emotional frequency and psychological landscape.

    Rather than traditional songwriting, Project 19.5 focuses on much, but not all non-lyrical vocals, breath, tone, texture, and instinct. My voice is treated as an instrument—hovering between noise, chant, dream, and ritual—allowing listeners to project their own meaning without being guided by explicit words. This approach creates an immersive emotional experience that exists somewhere between beauty and unease.

    In 2025, the project entered a new phase: revisiting, remixing, and remastering archival material to finally release it in its most refined and intentional form. These recordings preserve the raw spirit of their original creation while enhancing the depth, clarity, and atmosphere—bridging past and present into a singular evolving entity.

    Project 19.5 represents the ethereal side of XZanthia—still haunting, still unsettling, but softer and more internal than her darker project, Jupiter’s Thunder. The Project 19.5 album Uzumaki exists within this realm as a gentler spiral, incorporating lyrics while maintaining a dreamlike, hypnotic quality.

    This is music designed to be felt rather than understood—a liminal soundscape for introspection, transformation, and emotional resonance beyond language.
    YouTube.com/XZanthiaMUSIC 👽💿🎤🎶🎵 This is music that refuses to sit still. It isn’t here to soothe you or fade into the background— it exists to keep you alert, slightly off-balance, never certain what’s about to unfold next. Every moment is a corner you haven’t turned yet. Just when you think you understand it, it shifts, lunges, softens, surprises. It’s an acquired taste, absolutely— not something inherited, familiar, or politely nostalgic. This is not comfort food. This is appetite disruption. I want the sound to confuse you, to intrigue you, to make you uneasy in a way that keeps pulling you closer. To catch you enjoying tension, finding pleasure in resistance, realizing that discomfort can feel intimate when it refuses to let go. You may not always know what you’re hearing, but you’ll never be bored— because at any moment it’s ready to leap out, wrap around you, and pull you into that strange place where struggle feels like an embrace. Project 19.5 is an ethereal, esoteric music project that began in 1998, long before genres like “witch house,” “dark ambient,” or “experimental pop” had names attached to them. What started as intimate sonic experimentation grew over decades into a body of work shaped by collaborations with multiple producers across different eras, each phase capturing a different emotional frequency and psychological landscape. Rather than traditional songwriting, Project 19.5 focuses on much, but not all non-lyrical vocals, breath, tone, texture, and instinct. My voice is treated as an instrument—hovering between noise, chant, dream, and ritual—allowing listeners to project their own meaning without being guided by explicit words. This approach creates an immersive emotional experience that exists somewhere between beauty and unease. In 2025, the project entered a new phase: revisiting, remixing, and remastering archival material to finally release it in its most refined and intentional form. These recordings preserve the raw spirit of their original creation while enhancing the depth, clarity, and atmosphere—bridging past and present into a singular evolving entity. Project 19.5 represents the ethereal side of XZanthia—still haunting, still unsettling, but softer and more internal than her darker project, Jupiter’s Thunder. The Project 19.5 album Uzumaki exists within this realm as a gentler spiral, incorporating lyrics while maintaining a dreamlike, hypnotic quality. This is music designed to be felt rather than understood—a liminal soundscape for introspection, transformation, and emotional resonance beyond language.
    0 التعليقات 0 المشاركات 2كيلو بايت مشاهدة
  • Hey you gorgeous lot!!! For those who realized I went MIA for a bit.. LOVE YA! lol. I have been working on Christmas for hubs and the cats so been busy as hell lol. Just wanted to remind you all that you are fabulous and amazing and lovely and if the holidays are hard for you I am so sorry and you arent alone. Keep your head up and remember your strength loves <3
    Hey you gorgeous lot!!! For those who realized I went MIA for a bit.. LOVE YA! lol. I have been working on Christmas for hubs and the cats so been busy as hell lol. Just wanted to remind you all that you are fabulous and amazing and lovely and if the holidays are hard for you I am so sorry and you arent alone. Keep your head up and remember your strength loves <3
    Dark Love
    Goth Vibes
    On Fire
    4
    2 التعليقات 0 المشاركات 716 مشاهدة
  • Good new, I haven't been deported yet.

    Bad news is that you get put on a WHOLE different watch list when you speak Russian in front of CBP.
    Good new, I haven't been deported yet. Bad news is that you get put on a WHOLE different watch list when you speak Russian in front of CBP.
    0 التعليقات 0 المشاركات 643 مشاهدة
  • BREAKING: President Trump and AG Pam Bondi just asked a federal court in Florida to release EPSTEIN TRANSCRIPTS that are currently sealed.

    The filing comes barely 2 days after Trump signed the Epstein Files Transparency Act.

    The DOJ is now arguing the new law OVERRIDES a law that allowed these documents to remain sealed.

    HUGE BACKFIRE on the left.
    BREAKING: President Trump and AG Pam Bondi just asked a federal court in Florida to release EPSTEIN TRANSCRIPTS that are currently sealed. The filing comes barely 2 days after Trump signed the Epstein Files Transparency Act. The DOJ is now arguing the new law OVERRIDES a law that allowed these documents to remain sealed. HUGE BACKFIRE on the left.
    0 التعليقات 0 المشاركات 2كيلو بايت مشاهدة
  • So I had to share this,I work with probably some of the WEIRDEST people ever,I mean ever. My job as a grocery bagger is good,I walk there and enjoy what I do but some of the conversations that go on....yeah just SO weird I won't go into detail. Also I'm still there and haven't gotten fired....yet. So I'm hopeing to stay there for awhile,as much as everyone had changed there attitudes twords me I don't care really.....I think I get treated differently because of how I dress and that fact I like extreme and quality music...oh well....!
    So I had to share this,I work with probably some of the WEIRDEST people ever,I mean ever. My job as a grocery bagger is good,I walk there and enjoy what I do but some of the conversations that go on....yeah just SO weird I won't go into detail. Also I'm still there and haven't gotten fired....yet. So I'm hopeing to stay there for awhile,as much as everyone had changed there attitudes twords me I don't care really.....I think I get treated differently because of how I dress and that fact I like extreme and quality music...oh well....!
    0 التعليقات 0 المشاركات 1كيلو بايت مشاهدة
  • Happiness and good Fortune are like a golden sand flowing into an hourglass of life sometimes there are black grains representing the bad things that sometimes happen but for most they are tuning to gold once they reach the majority of gold.
    But for some people the sand has more black grains than most, and some of those tend to give their few golden grains to others to help them turn their black to gold, which often leave the givers with overpowering obsidian sand that often turns new gold to black. And if they ask others for just a speckle of gold in return to help Turing the black to gold, they often have to beg for it or end up turning the others sand black just by opening their their hourglass.

    I am certainly one of the latter people. My body and mind is filled with poisonous black sand and my tongue turns it into venom injecting it to others whenever reach for support or comfort.
    I have realized a very concerning pattern that gives me the worst anxiety right now. I'm poisoning the last golden grain of sand whenever I open my heart and don't swallow my feelings for once.
    I should finally stop trying and go back to being the quiet listener that gives her golden grains to others and fights against the black by herself. That will spare me from a lot of feelings of disappointment, and anxiety and guilt about upsetting others by voicing when I'm being upset or disappointed. I'll just suck it up and be too forgiving for my own good the sake of harmony.
    How sad is that? I have become scared of being upset because it upsets others and I feel guilty then. Can one be more of a peoplepleaser just to not end up all alone?

    Today was a terrible day on so many levels, not only was I still feeling upset, I was also anxious to the point of barely being able to breathe because I had I realized this destructive and poisonous pattern that always, really ALWAYS has been following when I open up and threatens the last good thing I have that is supposed to be an anchor right now.
    And on top of all, some actually supposedly good news came in from a friend but I can't be happy for them instead it really pulls me down because the topic reminds me of my health issues that are kinda related...
    And as I currently have no one to talk to because my tongue is venomous and I just ruin everone elses minds, I have to rant it out to strangers in the internet. Maybe the more creative writing approach I took in the beginning is at least somewhat enjoyable to read. It was kind inspired by this song...
    https://youtu.be/FK3TDHnD1_0?list=RDFK3TDHnD1_0
    Happiness and good Fortune are like a golden sand flowing into an hourglass of life sometimes there are black grains representing the bad things that sometimes happen but for most they are tuning to gold once they reach the majority of gold. But for some people the sand has more black grains than most, and some of those tend to give their few golden grains to others to help them turn their black to gold, which often leave the givers with overpowering obsidian sand that often turns new gold to black. And if they ask others for just a speckle of gold in return to help Turing the black to gold, they often have to beg for it or end up turning the others sand black just by opening their their hourglass. I am certainly one of the latter people. My body and mind is filled with poisonous black sand and my tongue turns it into venom injecting it to others whenever reach for support or comfort. I have realized a very concerning pattern that gives me the worst anxiety right now. I'm poisoning the last golden grain of sand whenever I open my heart and don't swallow my feelings for once. I should finally stop trying and go back to being the quiet listener that gives her golden grains to others and fights against the black by herself. That will spare me from a lot of feelings of disappointment, and anxiety and guilt about upsetting others by voicing when I'm being upset or disappointed. I'll just suck it up and be too forgiving for my own good the sake of harmony. How sad is that? I have become scared of being upset because it upsets others and I feel guilty then. Can one be more of a peoplepleaser just to not end up all alone? Today was a terrible day on so many levels, not only was I still feeling upset, I was also anxious to the point of barely being able to breathe because I had I realized this destructive and poisonous pattern that always, really ALWAYS has been following when I open up and threatens the last good thing I have that is supposed to be an anchor right now. And on top of all, some actually supposedly good news came in from a friend but I can't be happy for them instead it really pulls me down because the topic reminds me of my health issues that are kinda related... And as I currently have no one to talk to because my tongue is venomous and I just ruin everone elses minds, I have to rant it out to strangers in the internet. Maybe the more creative writing approach I took in the beginning is at least somewhat enjoyable to read. It was kind inspired by this song... https://youtu.be/FK3TDHnD1_0?list=RDFK3TDHnD1_0
    Dark Love
    1
    0 التعليقات 0 المشاركات 3كيلو بايت مشاهدة
  • Lately, When I express my genuine thoughts and concerns, it feels like a form of punishment.

    This happens both at work, in meetings where input is supposedly valued, and in my personal life. My attempts to voice a concern or a different perspective are often dismissed as pessimism, exaggeration, or even egomania. It seems I am being penalized simply for having an opinion and for caring enough to be concerned.

    Increasingly, I feel that I am being passively silenced—not with a direct command, but with subtle cues and reactions that make thinking feel like a forbidden act. I am being reduced to a sounding board, a wall for others to shout at, with no expectation of a reciprocal conversation. My role is not to contribute, but to absorb.

    And then, people wonder. They wonder why I am burning out, why my energy and creativity have evaporated, why my motivation has dwindled to nothing. They don't see the cumulative weight of being silenced.
    I notice that the situation is gradually affecting my body. I currently only sleep with a tight chest and painful breathing, and I wake up in the middle of the night with my heart racing.
    Lately, When I express my genuine thoughts and concerns, it feels like a form of punishment. This happens both at work, in meetings where input is supposedly valued, and in my personal life. My attempts to voice a concern or a different perspective are often dismissed as pessimism, exaggeration, or even egomania. It seems I am being penalized simply for having an opinion and for caring enough to be concerned. Increasingly, I feel that I am being passively silenced—not with a direct command, but with subtle cues and reactions that make thinking feel like a forbidden act. I am being reduced to a sounding board, a wall for others to shout at, with no expectation of a reciprocal conversation. My role is not to contribute, but to absorb. And then, people wonder. They wonder why I am burning out, why my energy and creativity have evaporated, why my motivation has dwindled to nothing. They don't see the cumulative weight of being silenced. I notice that the situation is gradually affecting my body. I currently only sleep with a tight chest and painful breathing, and I wake up in the middle of the night with my heart racing.
    0 التعليقات 0 المشاركات 2كيلو بايت مشاهدة
  • Gen X here. The most important and crucial difference from my time compared to today: We knew how to relax and have a good time. We certainly didn't let politicians make us fight their battle for them. Divide and conquer has always been the mantra, and if you youngbloods think anyone of those in Washington are making things difficult for those with different viewpoints with your best interest in mind, you're living in a fantasy world.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_9l5WZ774Sg
    Gen X here. The most important and crucial difference from my time compared to today: We knew how to relax and have a good time. We certainly didn't let politicians make us fight their battle for them. Divide and conquer has always been the mantra, and if you youngbloods think anyone of those in Washington are making things difficult for those with different viewpoints with your best interest in mind, you're living in a fantasy world. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_9l5WZ774Sg
    Goth Vibes
    1
    0 التعليقات 0 المشاركات 1كيلو بايت مشاهدة
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