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The suicidal thoughts are coming back.
I feel so left behind in life. I have no career. I have a dead end job, I live at home, and I isolate myself due to the inevitable daily avalanches of shame and guilt that I deal with everyday.
I've been exercising to try and fight the bad thoughts and emotions and that has been helping along with meditation, but fuck; it's like an uphill battle!
I hate my job, i hate my life, and how everything looks so bleak and everything feels so fucking heavy.
I don't like being a downer. Usually, I keep this kind of stuff to myself, but I just wanted to vent somewhere.
Maybe this might bring an audience or maybe not, I just wanted this out there and away from me.
It sucks that I can't comment or like people's comments on posts anonymously because I would.
I have talked about this before, but my mental health is fucked up.
I really wish meds worked for me...
I am in therapy, and so far, my therapist is on vacation for 2 weeks.
Great for him, but I am deteriorating quickly.
Life sucks. It really does.
The suicidal thoughts are coming back. I feel so left behind in life. I have no career. I have a dead end job, I live at home, and I isolate myself due to the inevitable daily avalanches of shame and guilt that I deal with everyday. I've been exercising to try and fight the bad thoughts and emotions and that has been helping along with meditation, but fuck; it's like an uphill battle! I hate my job, i hate my life, and how everything looks so bleak and everything feels so fucking heavy. I don't like being a downer. Usually, I keep this kind of stuff to myself, but I just wanted to vent somewhere. Maybe this might bring an audience or maybe not, I just wanted this out there and away from me. It sucks that I can't comment or like people's comments on posts anonymously because I would. I have talked about this before, but my mental health is fucked up. I really wish meds worked for me... I am in therapy, and so far, my therapist is on vacation for 2 weeks. Great for him, but I am deteriorating quickly. Life sucks. It really does.
Sad
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