i was sittin on a lovely bench last night looked to my right a couple of guys and one ems wife all drinkin smokin cigarettes on the saturday night i was thinkin about how i had nothing but a light one em walked over to the trashcan next to me and dropped his half beer in and gave me a grin well it wasnt a grin but it was some kind of look as i looked at the beer i would have gladly took fall down just no consideration man down man down as he walked back he mumbled something about how "its just a beer, cant even throw a beer away, """" i thought maybe he assumed i was an environmental nut scoffing at a bottle not being recycled i had had enough time to move on i get up and they are blocking my way i judge the go around no fucking way i got all night but not all day i move to walk through the group of three two men standing much bigger than me the woman sitting alone laughing on the bench made for three the man in the middle stops laughing and looks at me i gesture because i just want to walk by and he asks me "do you got a problem?" all my problems surface in my mind and i sigh as i know ill tell him every goddamn one and i realize this is just an alpha thing and these alphas are drunk they want to fight someone but me seriously do they think that i think im bruce fucking lee i just hold up the crumpled cigarette i had found on the ground and ask if i could have one of theres they had been passing around the man says to the woman on the bench oh he just needs a light although he heard me wrong it sounded for a second we might get along and she looks over and sees the lighter in my other hand and tells the man he has a light and he looks at me and i clarify for my habit justice and peace as all three take a moment looking at me i notice the pause and the man says no and like someone pressed play the woman took her hand out of her purse and they all stayed quiet looking at me the end and not the end happy birthday

On september 6th im going to see falling in reverse with slaughter to prevail and sleep theory. Unfortunately hollywood undead is there too. But its worth it.

How I feel before my morning coffee and constitution. Except in felt pajama pants. No there's no dragons on them! That's for babies! (There's lil gray skulls like the Cool Guys wear...Stop laughing at me cus I'm neuro divergent!)

Do you laugh when other people fall? An obvious human trait. Do you cheer when they brush the the dust off and get back up? Something to consider as another human trait.

Its easy to laugh and mock when you are on the otherside of the beating. Maybe I'll do the same when its your turn.

Embrace the Storm I wrote a poem, which will become a future song, about my 15year partner PJ ♥️⬇️♥️ Embrace the Storm by XZanthia He doesn’t flinch when the lightning hits. He never asked me to dim. He just stood still while the sky cracked open and smiled like it was beautiful. He saw the fire in my chest and didn’t reach for water. He knew I wasn’t dangerous I was divine. He don’t compete, he completes He don’t crumble when the current heats While boys bail out, he’s building rafts While others fear, he laughs at collapse I shook the room, he didn’t blink I roared in rage, he made me think He knows how to hold without holding me back and that’s how you carry a queen’s heart intact To walk beside a powerful woman you don’t need chains you need courage Not armor, but honor Not silence, but space He never caged the lioness He never named me “too much” He simply looked and let me be until I let him see everything Powerful presence, patient, precise Protecting peace without a price Fire-fed, focused, feeling full He’s not afraid, I’m never dull He’s got thunder in his spine Steel in his silence Grace in his gaze and no trace of violence HE NEVER RAN FROM MY RAGE! HE NEVER NEEDED ME SMALL! HE HELD MY CHAOS IN HIS HANDS AND NEVER DROPPED ME AT ALL! Other men feared me He faced me Other men chased me He stayed When I shattered, he sharpened me When I wept, he witnessed me He didn’t want to fix the fire He wanted to feel it with me And maybe you think this song’s about you… Maybe you wish it could be But only a rare one gets written into fire like this. Real ones rise when her voice shakes the walls Real ones don’t shrink when the goddess calls If she’s the storm, he’s the ground beneath Still. Sure. Strong in belief. This ain’t fiction, it’s a fact You want a queen? Learn how to act Not to conquer, not to own But to honor her like a throne HE NEVER ASKED ME TO SHUT UP! NEVER ASKED ME TO SHRINK! HE TOOK MY FIRE AND FED IT!! I am the flame And he holds me I am the howl And he hears me I am the storm But he never tried to stop the rain He just stood With open hands And loves me without fear.

They say laughter is the best medicine— Too bad I have cancer.

Got a message from an original VF'er Ive known since 2017/2018 and he had me laughing which was awesome cause damn needed the laughs :)

Laughinh at my own Jokes LIKE::::

Try not to Laugh .... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VOI6kHApekM